Review – The Last Man – Worst Movie Ever

The Last man cover


This, my friends, is on the top 10 list of worst movies ever made. I don’t know what they other 9 entries are right now, but I know this movie is one of the 10. I couldn’t make it past the first hour. About the time the Raphael leaves. This mind numbing rambling David Arnott’s character does about this Wasabi (sp? whatever) tribe is something only a research professor desperate to hang onto their government grant could care about. I have actually met people like this during my life. They desperately cling to some tiny obscure niche of the world profusely professing its importance when it has absolutely nothing to do with anything.

I loved Jeri Ryan as Seven of Nine in Star Trek Voyager. She was also great in Shark. Geeks everywhere loved it when she was given a role in Warehouse 13 as Pete Lattimer’s ex-wife. She’s come a long way for someone who once made an appearance on Who’s the Boss.

Many years ago I worked as a midnight computer operator doing call record collection. Doesn’t matter if you don’t know what that is. Suffice it to say there were 2, sometimes 3 of us, in a room doing monotonous tasks with slow dial-up modems. Most of you don’t even know what a dial-up modem is but you realize things were slow with time for conversation. One of my coworkers was a huge Woody Allen fan. He didn’t understand why I didn’t like Woody Allen movies. I gave him the only reason I could.

You have to be Woody Allen to like a Woody Allen movie.

When it comes to “The Last Man” you have to be a neurotic professor desperate for tenure and grant money to like this movie.

Dystopian angle?

Perhaps I’m a bit hard on this because I’ve written dystopian stuff like “John Smith – Last Known Survivor of the Microsoft Wars.” I mean, supposedly everybody instantaneously died where they were, and had been dead for a while, but, the bodies didn’t decompose, electricity was still working in the cities, he was still finding bread on shelves which hadn’t grown a lovely coat of blue fur. Apparently gas stations were operational as these people were driving into town multiple times per day and they were simply stocking up on food from the supermarket.

Sadly, a college professor who spent much of their life desperately clinging to some obscure research niche would behave as David Arnott’s character. He would continue on as if his tiny slice of minutia was the most important thing in the universe. What really honked me off from the very beginning is this guy was carrying on as if his city life would continue without venturing out to the area of California (movie claimed to be in the Bay area) where fruits and vegetables were grown to make certain the crops were okay so they would have food beyond the one year shelf life of most canned goods. I mean even Will Smith in I am Legend took the time to plant food on an island in New York.

“The Last Man” is a movie you can safely skip. Worst movie ever made.

For more movie rental ideas please see list one and list two.

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