Sorry about not putting the tick after the n in the title, but, can’t have those special characters given the way WordPress creates file names.
If you’re one of those trigger word warning, safe zones, gotta be wrapped in bubble pack and cotton balls wastes of oxygen, just stop reading now. This post is all about politically incorrect ranting. Why? Because everybody, not matter how polished the exterior, has that part of them. The wastes of oxygen just refuse to admit theirs. That’s why they have to have so much therapy.
In all honesty, this post started in the parking lot of a McDonald’s. Go figure. Someone talking about obesity and McDonald’s in the same post. Everybody’s mind, especially a writer’s mind, has these trigger points. You don’t know where, you don’t know when, the little Fornit in your mind sees something and starts creating. (Okay, massive liberty there, since Fornit’s only live in certain typewriters, not computer keyboards, but if you read the back of “Skeleton Crew” you will understand some liberties are allowed. He talks about wanting to feed his Fornit Ex-Lax.)
While I was scanning around trying not to get mowed down by a soccer mom with 12 kids in a minivan trying to into the drive-thru, I saw what first appeared to be a disembodied head. After a second it was a head and the top two inches of shoulders. It kept waddling along and getting closer, but was still hidden by first a car then a car door. The little Fornit blurted out “Walkin’ like a fat girl” and I continued on without knowing if the Fornit reached down to make my mouth say that or not. Nobody was around so I guess I’ll never know.
An actor damned well better observe these things. If you wish to have any prayer as a writer, no matter how politically incorrect they are, you need to include them in your prose. They provide both the realism and the seasoning. You’ve all seen it. Some of you try to push it out of your mind because you were raised to be a waste of oxygen. It’s that gate a person gets when obesity starts causing significant body damage in the joints. That side to side waddle. It’s different than the arthritis hobble old people get. Arthritis is a stiff, slow shuffle. The obesity waddle develops when the person starts trying to use they whole body to walk so no part of it has to do too much. It takes far more effort that regular walking for someone who has not yet achieved obesity. This waddle has a signature side to side move, more accentuated at the head and shoulders as the whole body pulls the leg up because the muscles can’t. Arthritic walkers still can lift their legs as a normal walker, it just hurts, so they tend to shuffle without the body waddle.
Both writers and actors need to take some time to sit outside a McDonald’s or an all you can eat buffet during a busy supper hour and watch the people coming and going. A person’s walk can say a lot about them if you let it.
