Featured image by Bruno /Germany from Pixabay
Digging through my travel bag I found my trunks, flip flops and a pair of dark sun glasses. I stopped off to switch loads from washer to dryer and headed for the sun by the pool after setting the alarm on this new phone. Nothing clears the head like a container of cold heavily processed carcinogens and an alzheimer’s inducing aluminum foil package of room temperature, dry, heavily salted even more processed carcinogens while basking in the sun.
Tonight I would have to let either Slim or Stretch know about Giant’s on-line activities. Why couldn’t he just surf for porn like everyone else? It was correctable behavior anyway. I was not letting that computer out of my sight again.
***
Everybody started trickling in about 4:30. I had already showered off the sunscreen and was putting away my now clean clothes when Slim and Giant entered with yet another round of shopping.
“Just because I gave you all of that money doesn’t mean you have to spend it on clothes” I said sarcastically.
“It’s not just clothes” responded Slim. “Here, take this garment bag. We made sure they were all different.”
“Yours we picked up at a thrift store” spouted Giant.
“Good, you should have gotten them all there so they have that lived-in look” I responded, not taking the bait. “Get the tags off your clothes. If you need to wash them before wearing I have some detergent and dryer sheets left over there.”
“I’ll take care of that” volunteered Giant. “I know how to properly care for clothing.” With that he grabbed the laundry basket from their room and started cutting tags like a mad man. Twenty minutes later he had a pile of empty bags, plastic wrapping and tags.
“There’s a big garbage can by the laundry” I stated. Slim started gathering up the trash.
“I said I would do the laundry!” snapped Giant.
“I’m just taking out the trash lover. If you want to try juggling it all on the way down, so be it” answer Slim.
After Giant was gone I asked softly “you two having a lover’s quarrel?”
“Something like that” Slim responded. “He’s unwilling to adapt to our current situation. Personally I can wear K-Mart clothes most days of the year, but not him.”
“That’s not all” I responded fishing for the print outs as Slim cocked an eyebrow. “Nothing bad yet so not for me to say anything to him, but, see for yourself. Here’s the laptop if you want to verify the URLs.”
“I can read enough of them, but I would like to use the laptop. What you said about that botched job has been eating at me. If I can start with that, this entire conversation will go easier” Slim said.
“No need to bring it up tonight. We are going to some place he wanted to go. I’ll just keep this in my room for the duration. We need to seem like happy tourists tomorrow. Coming back with T-shirts, hats and laughing smiles.”
“Agreed” said Slim. After waking up the computer he began “I take it you have been fucked like this before?”
“Not like this, no, but close enough. Management has had a few, how shall we say, upheavals, during my tenure. Every new broom wishes to sweep clean, installing its own power base. Remind me, when we are out tonight to call Pretty Little Thing’s voice mail so she has my number in her call history.”
“I honestly thought you were going to have us be her point of contacts so you could remain in the wind as far as they were concerned” answered Slim.
“The thought had occurred to me, but, by now they have determined we are together. I mean, even a fool could have found the restaurant we ate at.”
Just then Stretch walked in grinning.
“Well, either you got lucky or something good happened” spoke Slim.
“Not lucky, no, not yet. If we stayed here a few more days I could probably get us invited to an orgy. Even though this is the heart of the Holy Roller Bible Belt, there is a thriving gay community. Many of them are people of power and privilege. One of them runs the coin shop” Stretch almost sang. Slim noticed it too.
“Don’t just sit there looking like the cat that ate the canary, spill” challenged Slim.
“While we are here I need to put everything on this card. Then we will hide it for emergency use only. No way we will spend that much in a short time” Stretch exclaimed.
“You didn’t see all of the bags Giant came back with. He might have spent twice that already” I chucked.
“13-5 for the coins” Stretch answered without missing a beat. “And that was after they took 20%!” I asked Pepboys to take the ride to a really good detailing shop when they were done.”
“I gotta ask, and don’t take this the wrong way . . .”
“No! I didn’t ghetto the ride out!” spat Stretch. “I understand what keeping a low profile means! You just ruined my high!”
“Weeeell” started Slim as he handed the print out to Stretch, “quite a bit of that going around.”
“That son-of-a-bitch!” exclaimed Stretch. “I knew he would do something like this! Thought about it all the way to the coin shop!”
“No harm so far. I’ll just keep the computer out of reach. Wait until we are out of town to bring it up so we can maintain the facade of being happy tourist just waiting on a few car repairs. I will keep the computer in my room when we aren’t all here” I stated.
“No harm!” squeaked Stretch.
“It doesn’t look like he tried to open any accounts, just did some research. No harm yet, but, could have been” I stated. “We’ll keep temptation from his fingertips until you’ve had a chance to speak with him at our next stop.”
“Are you booking our next accommodations now?” Stretch asked Slim.
“No” said Slim turning the laptop so we could see. “Confirming the Old Timer isn’t full of shit.”
He couldn’t have timed that any more perfectly. Giant walked through the door carrying the laundry detergent and empty basket.
“How can you be so certain he’s not full of . . .” Giant trailed off as the screen came into his view. “No way! Those bastards didn’t clean the site! We are so fucked!”
“Now” began Slim, “when Old Timer tells us we have to do something to stay alive, we aren’t going to get all prissy about it are we?”
“What? You guys been talking about me while I was gone?” stammered Giant.
“A little” I said. “It’s more polite to speak behind someone’s back, but, mostly, were were just starting to plan our next couple of days and debating about booking accommodations now on a travel site or waiting until we arrive. Also planning tomorrow.”
“What about tonight?” asked Giant.
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